I'm happy to have CS Kendall join me today! She's sharing about the inner struggle, devil vs. dreamer, she faced while writing her new release. I'm glad CS's dreamer voice won out and The Killing Cure is now available for readers to enjoy. Be sure to check out her book and also her great giveaway contest at the end of this post.
Hi there! Thanks for having me today! It’s such an honor to be here and thanks for allowing me and my book to stop by for a visit!
I can’t believe we’re finally here! The Killing Cure: Drink was the product of much toil and a few tears. It ended up at a very different place than it began, but I am so excited how the story has evolved.
As excited as I am now, there were those other days. The ones that usually came on the heels of feeling like I was on the cusp of something truly magical.
“Those days” sucked all the magic dry.
Those days were the ones when I couldn’t get the story to connect from point A to point B, or I got some tough editing notes (editors are SO vital to this process), or I was exhausted and couldn’t focus my mind to stare at the computer screen any longer, or I just wasn’t sure where I wanted to take a character...
And on those days the dream of bringing a book to publication felt so far outside my grasp that reaching for it seemed like a complete waste of time and effort. The voices in my head carried on somewhat like this:
Dreamer Me: I can do this.
The Devil On My Shoulder: Even if you “do it” no one will read it. Even if they read it, they will most likely hate it.
Dreamer Me: No, if I keep at it I can whip it into a well-executed piece of literature.
The Devil On My Shoulder: Nah. The best you can do is write a bunch of gibberish down. And you don’t learn. You still like to tell instead of show and sometimes overuse adverbs.
Dreamer Me: I’ve improved a lot.
The Devil: Eh.
Dreamer Me: Maybe it would be better to just walk away. I mean, after all, I have a job, a family, commitments, friendships to maintain….
The Devil: Now, you’re talking. It takes too much time. You’re neglecting every other good thing in your life. And for what? It could all be for nothing.
Dreamer Me: Ugh! I love it, though. But you’re right, D, it’ll probably end up being for nothing. And then I’ll look back and regret the time I gave to writing instead of to my children.
The Devil: Yup, you’re pretty much the worst mom ever.
Defeated Dreamer Me (reduced to a whisper): But I love it.
And on it went. Anything can spur that devilish voice of self debt.
But you know what? I do love to write. And I kept responding to that little nay-saying devil on my shoulder until I shouted loud enough and confidently enough to make him shut up. And when I did that, guess what? The good kind of feeling returned.
The one that makes World Domination feel like it’s just around the corner, the hope and belief that little ‘ol me might be able to write something that someone-maybe someones-enjoys reading. All that creative energy, those unwritten stories swirling around inside-those are for me to write. Sure, someone might be able to write them better. But they are mine, and they are nagging me to put them down on paper.
In the end, when I finally released that baby out into the world, she was embraced with loving arms. And now I know I can do it. I can put words down, I can make them shine, and a few someones even like them!
So, at the end of the day, Dreamer Me wins out every single time. Because the truth is, I do love love the art of crafting a story and besides that, with as loud as the Devil On My Shoulder can sometimes be, those stories shout louder.
I’m going to listen. How about you?
Genre: Paranormal Romance
Date of Publication: September 24, 2015
Number of pages: 200
Word Count: 63,871
Cover Artist: Shari Ryan
Childhood friendship turns to love in this dark reimagining of the fountain of youth. In 1919, Charlie returns from WWI and gives his heart to Julia. As their love story begins, tragedy strikes when Julia contracts a deadly illness.
On her deathbed, dreams of a future together shatter, but Charlie refuses to give up, convincing Julia to drink from a vial of “healing waters” his war buddy swore would bring spontaneous healing. Julia's miraculous recovery brings hope, but the water's murderous side effects snuff out the couple’s short-lived joy.
Can Charlie help Julia fight the water's call to kill? All their efforts may be in vain when Julia has to choose between running from the curse or embracing it in order to save Charlie.
Journey with Julia and Charlie through a love story that spans a hundred years and an age-old curse that spans more and worse, puts Charlie’s life and Julia’s soul at risk.
Book Trailer: https://youtu.be/NLNDojMxckQ
She wheeled me to our meeting place. Charlie was not sitting on the lumpy couch like he usually was; instead, he stood, his feet almost bouncing as they met the ground. His eyes were bright, his smile bigger than I’d ever seen.
As soon as we were alone, I asked, "What are you so happy about?"
"First," he said and then kissed me. "Second, I’m happy because today you’re going to get well."
I hardly had the energy to lift my gaze to his face. "Can you sit, please?"
"Oh sure, of course. See, I knew you’d beat this thing. It only became clear to me today how it would happen. I took the next train as soon as I knew."
"What are you talking about?"
"Sorry. Okay." He took a deep breath and tried again. "Do you remember my war buddy Arnold I told you about?"
"Was he the one who wanted to be the horse doctor or the one with the bizarre obsession with water?"
"The water." Charlie’s eyes lit, and he pulled a chain from his pocket. On the end of it was a small vial with a clear liquid in it. "All I’ve thought about since I left you last was how I couldn’t lose you. I racked my brain all week long, prayed to God for you when I should've been sleeping, until the answer came this morning. I remembered I had it. You should've heard how he carried on and on about this water, how it would heal, how he went through hell to get it but it was worth it should he ever need it. And I thought, ‘Why let it go to waste?’ Especially now that you need it so badly. Obviously there was a reason I held on to the water. It wasn’t clear until now."
"Oh, I love you. But there's no such thing as healing waters. You said yourself he was superstitious."
"I know I did, but what if there's more to it than I thought? I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before."
"Look at me, Charlie. I am skin and bones. My entire body hurts, and I can barely eat. I am being consumed right before your eyes, and you’ve got your sights set on some silly potion."
And then I saw it. Behind the fire in Charlie’s eyes lived desperation. All his hope hinged on this sip of water. Insane as it was, he was willing to embrace any farfetched possibility if it meant he didn’t have to face the reality of living without me.
His face fell a little at my words, but he wouldn't be discouraged. "What will it hurt? Drink it, please. For me." He held the vial out, and I studied him. Hopelessness threatened to burst through the expectation in his eyes, and I felt sad for him. I, with a body full of consumption, pitied Charlie.
The pity came on the heels of my love for him. His plea warmed my heart, desperate as it was, because somewhere, deep down, despite all his optimism and prayers, he knew I was going to die. I took it from him, opened it up, and tipped it back. What harm could one small sip of water do?
C.S. Kendall spent her formative years growing up in the small town of McPherson, KS. As such, there was not much to do, so her imagination, which always lagged behind her age, had free reign. From playing dress up into her teens, recording radio shows with various voices and storylines with her friends, to dappling with the art of crafting a novel, there were few dull moments for her. Enter adulthood, a day job, and the backburner. But story came calling, and finally, her imagination woke up and answered. Though she loves and is fulfilled by her job as a social work therapist, she equally enjoys running away in her mind to imaginary lands with made up people. She lives happily with her husband and their two amazing children in southwest Michigan.
Learn more by visiting http://cskendall.net
Amazon author page: http://www.amazon.com/C.S.-Kendall/e/B015UEF7IK/
$20 Amazon gift card AND 5 ebook copies